Wow! 11 months today. When I started out on this journey I had no idea how I was going to make it. I felt like I was about to give up my best friend, how was I going to cope, what was I going to do? My life revolved around smoking, if I wasn't smoking I was thinking about smoking and if I wasn't thinking about smoking, I was smoking. What did other people who didn't smoke actually do? They lived their life, they didn't miss the most important moments in their lives because they needed to smoke, go find a place to smoke or plot when they would have their next smoke. They didn't refuse to go out with their non smoking friends because they were having mini panic attacks because there would be no place to smoke, they didn't want to find any excuse in the book to not spend time with their family, because heaven forbid, they couldn't smoke. They didn't miss the game winning touchdown, homerun, or 3 pointer because they were smoking. They didn't miss their nieces first steps while vacationing in Hawaii, because they were holed in their room afraid the withdrawals were going to drive them to murder, because they didn't smoke in front of their family..and they never counted down the minutes when they would get the HELL out of Hawaii and back home to the mainland so they could finally smoke.
People on the site were talking about how great freedom was and how they look at smokers with pity! I thought they'd all done lost their minds because I was looking as smokers with ENVY! But not anymore, now I get it, now I see how much my life was ruled by an addictive substance, how I let it take over every facet of my life. I walked away from my "best friend" and am a much healthier, happier and better person for it. For those of you just starting out I beg of you stick with it, it gets better as time passes and you will find yourself going through hours, days, or even weeks where that isn't the first thing that you think of! This is the best and most amazing thing I've done for myself, but I couldn't have done it without my EX Family!! You all are ROCK STARS and I hope you'll all stand with me as this tigress ROOOOAAAAARRRRRRSSSSSS in 11 months of blessed, amazing and absolute freedom!! Love and HUGS to you all!
