Da#n it. This is hard to tell you but I need to. Have to start over again (again, again). There are no good excuses of course. I can list all my reasons but let me call it what it is. Just me being Stupid. A weakling addict. Bottom line. Been having smoking binges the last couple of weeks. (Smoking about 4-8 a day) It seems I can only get through a month or so and I fall apart again. I don't know what is wrong with me!! I KNOW better and you guys know I know better!! So I'm here again asking for your understanding, help and prayers. Please know I do take it seriously. I love and respect everyone here. I admire all of you strong ones and I'm embarrassed to be a serial quitter. I don't blame you if you want nothing more to do with me!!! I have one cig left. After that later today I am going to use the gum. Maybe Cold Turkey is too cold for me. So my plan is to use the next few days for a good running start. I'm having a very busy few days coming up with company staying over the weekend and going to visit friends. All nonsmokers. I think it will be an excellent time and way to get back on track. Then next week I want to start weaning off the gum or just see how it goes. If i need to keep using the gum for longer so be it. Im going to stop fighting that idea. Maybe its my ticket out. My main objective is to never drag that poison in my lungs again. Never never buy another pack. Never ever take another puff. (Esp Beware of one puff of Black and Mild!!! ). Anyway I just wanted to come here and 'fess up. Setting my quit day again for tomorrow and roll. Come here everyday and report my number, pledge, Freedom Train and use all the tools. I need to stay close and "accountable". So please bear with me. Gee maybe I will get this done by the year anniversary of my original start date last March!!! Lol. The only thing that cheers me up a little is that I keep wanting to quit. I haven't given up quitting!!! Who's with me on that? Any relapsers out there who want to join back up with me??
