Thank you for all your love, support and encouragement. This is said with deep feeling that doesn't show in the black and white. It is not in my nature to give up on anything that is so important to me.
Over the past 3 years, I have had to be in such control, no matter what, to do what I have to do. This past weekend it seemed that I was inundated with things I couldn't control. My mind then led me ( I let it) to feelings of grief for what my life was going to be, of guilt for feeling that way and of hopelessness for the foreverness of it. My head and my heart seem to work in different planes.
The past 3 years I have been on auto pilot to deal with what I needed to deal with. I am looking forward to my appt. next week withthe psychologist. I am hoping for the "click" between us to provide positive outcomes. I selected her based on issues she dealt with- stress, anxiety, elder, caregiver burnout. At least on paper that is a good fit.
