So Far, so Good

[lisa-denise-ely]

I went to my doctor appoingtment on Friday and talked to Dr. Rau.  Needless to say, he increased my wellbutrin from 300mg to 400mg.  It has been only four days but so far, so good.  I am feeling better but this drama with my Mom is so stupid; i didn't even do anything to merit this kind of backlash and beratement from my mother.  Like i said, its so stupid.  I am slowly realizing that my mom doesn't really love me unless i rub her the right way or do only what suits her.  (((Sigh))), so conditional with her 'love'.  I am exhausted from trying to appease her or avoid drama with her. And now she is on my facebook page fussing me out all the time.  Today, i was so mad i thought about rolling a cigarette;  but i didn't because i didn't want to go back into slavery to tobacco or nicotine.  So, i just had a cough drop instead.  

Today was hard but i know tomorrow will be harder as far as with my mom.  I have not been calling my mom or texting her or facebooking her at all since a couple of weeks ago.  You may think things are quiet between us but this is just the calm before the tornado.

-Lisa