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Share your quitting journey

Day 82!

kat102
Member
0 8 13

I took a peek at my days and wow! 82 already. Seems like yesterday... No, actually, I don't think about it that much anymore unless something reminds me.  There are still triggers that remind me, but I don't get cravings without triggers anymore.

I did have a close call last weekend. I had a few drinks. I can hear the moans and eyes rolling now....of course, alcohol. I should have known better. I'm not even one to drink...but we were eating Mexican and I was out with friends and somebody ordered a pitcher of Sangria. I love Sangria!  I had a ride home, so I indulged.

My friends were standing outside with cigarettes as I was coming out. And it was a brisk fall evening...The smell of the smoke and the leaves...almost overwhelmed me...and they didn't even ask if I wanted a cigarette...it was "do you want a drag?"

I admit I did a little impaired reasoning before alarm bells went off in my head...and it was YOU that saved me.  I had a flash to the letter I would have to write to YOU about how I'd failed, and then reset my clock to 0.  Yes, it was the fear of being shamed that kept me on the road of healthiness.

Now, you have not given me any reason to think that I would be publicly shamed or whipped with a stick. I have no parents in this room nor anyone who is that involved in my personal quit to be that upset with me...but I feel we are support for one another and we do keep each other going. Its a bond we all have, caring about each other and watching out for each other. We put faith in each other and pray for each other...  I know how I feel when I read someone's slip letter. My heart sinks.

When someone slips you just want to comfort them, because you know how hard they are coming down on themselves. They are feeling like a failure because the goal they have been working so hard for has just vanished. They have been climbing a mountain, starting to see the summit, but jumped on the train going to the bottom, knowingly. And now all their hard work is for naught, and they have to start over.

I've heard, but not seen, there can be 'tough love' in here. I understand that some may not want to understand, but rather, make sure the one who slips understands the severity of their actions and how dangerous it is to their quit. Yes, with some people, that works, you can drive the point home and they will get right back on that challenge and try harder. Others, between their own self talk, and your 'tough love', will lose their strength and give up trying for now. Its easier to keep smoking and feel bad about themselves. Hopefully it won't be too late when they want to try again.

Regardless, I'm still smoke-free. 82 days and counting. I've survived my first night out drinking with friends who smoke. It was too close for comfort though. I need to have a plan in mind for when it happens next time and the words rehearsed so I don't have to stop and think.   A simple ' No Thanks.' should suffice.

I'm going to a Halloween Party this weekend. I'm sure that will be the next time but I feel a lot better about it now.  I also know I won't drink because I'm doing the driving this time.

Happy Halloween everyone! and if you don't celebrate it, just have a nice weekend!

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