This Sunday, March 17, 2013, marks my 1 year anniversary of being smoke-free. For those that don't know me or are new to the Ex Community, I had filled out a survey about smoking. LIttle did I know how my life was going to change from there. I had finished my survey and completed a profile here and this is where my story begins.
In the past, I quit many times. The longest was for a year and the times after that seem to get harder each time until all I could do was just a few hours and I was desperately craving a smoke and almost crawling the walls. It was just a few months prior this happened to me and I just wasn't sure when I came to the site if I was able to do it or let alone wanted to do it. I was afraid I was going to fail yet again. The first person to greet me was Sheryl then Tommy. Everybody was very friendly and I was liking the site already . Following day I logged in and started doing some reading and got a message from Tommy. Not sure of exact words but were on the lines of "Have you set a quit date yet" and I was thinking to myself " Do I really want to do this? I just love the taste of that cigarette. There is no way I cant stop this time". I kept getting messages and seeing them through my email and decided at that point, why not give it a try. I logged in faithfully each day and read, read and read some more. I was thirsting for more and more information. Each day, i kept building up the courage and just knew that i could do this. So I was able to finally respond back and set my quit date to St. Pattys Day.
First day I put on the patch and by noon, I got a call from mom that she had fallen and couldn't get up. Her sugar was low and she just didn't seem right. She kept telling me she was fine and she did look better. Following day, she fell again and this time my bro, sis and me took her to the hospital. Found out her kidneys were failing. By following day, she took turn for worse and doctors told us she had pneumonia and had to be put on ventilator or she wouldn't make it through the night. To hear all this news in the first few days of your quit was just unbelievable! I did mention to Tommy briefly what was going on and he left me a message, "if you feel something warm, it's me holding your hand." It was those few words that I was able in the next few weeks to stay quit.We had mom life flighted to Cleveland Clinic where they were able to give her right meds and not long after she was coming home after rehabilitation. She didn't even need a trake after being on ventilator that long. If it wasn't for the prayers of everyone here, from our church, she wouldn't be alive today. It was trully a miracle that had unfolded in front of our eyes and the eyes of others. Rick always left on my message board, "Shawn it only gets better and better" and I can tell you, yes it does!
It doesn't matter what circumstance we go through, having just 1 cigarette or 1 puff, will NOT solve anything. As long as we prepare ourselves prior to our quit date, stay close to the site and blog when we are in trouble or just need someone to listen makes all the difference!! This can be and will be your forever quit! You have to believe it!!
